Friday, July 28, 2006

Vlogging Nasrallah Backfires Slightly...

From FireDogLake.com comes one of the funniest posts I've read in a while. Blogger Pam from Atlas Shrugs "vlogs" Nasrallah and Israel cancels her planned trip (to Israel). Don't miss Pam's YouTube vlogpost below!


Dear Israel-

We need to talk.

I thought we had a fucking deal. Me and all my liberal blogger cronies were going to blithely look the other way while you use overwhelming force against civilians in Lebanon, and you were supposed to take Pam from Atlas Shrugs and her excitable italics off our hands for a couple weeks.

And now I see that somehow in all the confusion last week, you backed off and now we’re stuck with her. From her blog:


The Press secretary of the Embassy of Israel called to cancel my trip to Israel. They recommend that I not go to Israel. Apparently they have canceled all my interviews and war coverage. Ugh.


Except to really get this statement in Pam-ese, it must be read:


Duh PRESS sick-ruh-tairy of duh EMM-buh-see of ISREE-uhl cuh-wald tuh KYEN-sul my trip tuh ISREE-uhl, etc….


In other words, someone in the Holy Land set up a bunch of interviews and events for her to attend and THEN looked at her blog and (eugh!) vlogs.

"Oh, shit! Itzhak! Get in here! We gotta problem!"

"Vhat? Vhat, Shlomo? Vhat’s so important it couldn’t wait until I’ve finished my coffee?"

"Remeber that blogger we’ve got coming from the US?"

"Who, zhet Pamela person?"

"Yeah. Look…"


(Cut to computer screen, where Pam is dancing and rapping in front of a salt water aquarium , holding an empty martini glass.)


Pam: "Betchoo wish yuh guhlfrinn’ was hot-like-me…"

"You’re right, Shlomo. We got a problem. You’d better call her and cancel."

"But! But! I set up all these interviews! What do I tell her?"

"Tell her we’re closed! Vhat do I care? Just make sure she doesn’t come here! Vhe got enough of a humanitarian crisis on our hands already!!"

Damn you, Israel. We were all sooooooo looking forward to it. Out of all the 101st fighting keyboarders, one, ONE (!!) conservative blogger gets ready to suit up and charge headlong into a war zone and you cancel??!! It was all going to be so exciting! Pam in Tel Aviv, desperately trying to find a Saks because she left her lip-liner back on Long Island. Pam in desert fatigues a la Judy Miller and Edina Monsoon, drunkenly attacking a bunch of Israeli peace protestors, "ANTI-SEMIIIIIIITES!!" she screams, then mounts an IDF bulldozer and drives into the crowd, "SAY HELLO TO RAYYY-CHULL FRICKIN’ CORRIEEEE FUH ME, YA MOOOOOOO-SLUM SYMPUH-T’IZAAAAHSS!!"

VROOOOM!!!

And all for nought. You took it all away from us, Israel. And you’re going to PAY.

8 Comments:

At 6:49 PM, Blogger Richard said...

That woman is barking. I watched her once before -- big mistake. Now you coax me into making the same mistake all over again. Grr. You shouls pay for this, Gert. Grrr!

Seriously though, she's so insane that there's every chance it won't be long before she becomes a billionaire. You know, being in America & all.

Now -- where's me bloody tablets gone?

;^)

 
At 1:44 PM, Blogger Gert said...

Richard:

She wants to be a dark haired version of Ann Coulter but clearly can't hold her drink... So, no, I don't think she'll strike it big any time soon.

 
At 2:02 PM, Blogger Richard said...

Ha! I thought more like a fundie version of Ruby Wax, Gert.

Also, o/topic, but while I'm here, have you seen this from a fairly new [probationary] poster at my place?

** Jrum said...
And then again... I could be wrong:


Re: Israeli students and their posting on websites.

1:12 PM

 
At 2:42 PM, Blogger Gert said...

Richard:

This is nothing new and entirely believable. For most of my life I've been subjected to accusations of "anti-Semitism", merely for being critical of certain aspects of Israel's behaviour in the region.

I've experienced so many abusive comments since I've stepped up blogging on Israel/Palestine, I've had to ban people, put comment moderation in place at times and have had to disallow anonymous commenting sometimes.

It's an "information war"...

 
At 8:28 PM, Blogger markfromireland said...

Gert me too. The same guy Richard is talking about has tried to claim I don't know how to track an IP address, uses particular turns of phrase not found in Britannic English, tried to deny that he started posting under a different name on Richard's site (and then admitted it) engaged in one ad hominem after another etc etc I now have him on moderation hold on my "markfromireland" site and he's squealing about "censorhip" sheeeesh.

 
At 4:20 PM, Blogger Gert said...

Mark:

It's symptomatic that those incapable of sticking to debate but instead start often vicious name-calling, also cry "foul" when we drop their excremental musings where they belong: in the trashcan...

My advice? Always allow one or two of these "comments", as a from of proof. These huys really don't understand how ridiculous they sound...

 
At 1:40 AM, Blogger What is "Occupation" said...

she just landed in israel, which is under attack by hezbollah, about 150 rockets today, and interesting news,

1. the attack on qana occured at 1 am, and the building that somehow collapsed happened at 7 am,, hmm,, did some hezbollah tnt suddenly go off?

2. within HOURS of the situation, hezbollah produced a 30 foot color banner calling condi all kinds of bad names about qana...

wow, is that not just amazing abilities or was it planned in advance?

 
At 10:50 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

No coincidence. Of course it was planned and manufactured in advance. And you know it was. It's no big deal though. They had it ready for whenever she arrived, you silly billy.

There could be one more possible explanation. I doubt you want to hear it though. Maybe their 'intelligence' is way, way ahead of what either Israel or America imagined it was.

 

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