Tuesday, November 04, 2008

Revenge a la Conservatives...

Below an email sent by a Conservative small business owner to... well, presumably other Conservative small business owners, received and published by a fellow-blogger (who shall remain unnamed on this occasion):
Dear Fellow Business Owners,

As a the owner of a business who employs 30 people, I have resigned myself to the fact that Barack Obama will be our next President, and that my taxes and government fees will go up in a BIG way.

To compensate for these increases, I figure that the Customer will have to see an increase in my prices to them of about 8%. I will also have to lay off 6 of my employees. This really bothered me for a while, as I believe we are family here and didn¢t know how to choose who will have to go.

So, this is what I did.I strolled thru the parking lot and found 8 Obama bumper stickers on my employees¢ cars. I have decided these folks will be the first to be laid off.I can't think of a more fair way to approach this problem.

If you have a better idea, let me know.I am sending this letter to all Business owners that I know.

Sincerely
Ward
JOOA Corp.

Ward's thoroughly pissed-off (if not actually thoroughly pissed tout court). He's about as well placed as I or anybody else is to judge what the precise consequences of Obama's tax plan (or McCain's for that matter - these things are never simple and not written with the ordinary Joe in mind) for his business (or anybody's business for that matter) will be but his Conservative crystal ball tells him that the "Customer will have to see an increase in my prices to them of about 8%". Having a thing with eights, Ward also found 8 Obama bumper stickers on his employee's cars and since as in Ward's twisted "8" shaped world it takes laying off about one employee per percent Ward anticipates to have to pass on to his customers... six Obama supporters will have to be laid off, plus an additional two Obamatons laid off presumably just for luck...

So yes, Ward, I do have a better idea. Before you start pre-emptively ruining your own business by laying off people left, right and centre (or in your case, left, left and left), calm down, pour yourself another Bourbon and just wait and see for a bit, huh?

I've long held the belief that to be successful in business doesn't require mouch of a genius. Ward's imbecilic and vindictive pre-emptive stance counts as another small piece of evidence towards that hypothesis... The spiteful pettiness of that man leads me also to believe his business wouldn't be granted a much longer life-span anyroads, Obama or McCain...

3 Comments:

At 11:08 AM, Blogger Emmanuel said...

If Obama's policies reduce his taxes, will he hire six additional Obama supporters? Somehow I doubt it.

I'm sure it is illegal to fire people for their political beliefs. The fired Obama supporters can sue his ass off for unlawful termination or whatever the legal term is. That definitely won't be good for his business.

 
At 3:03 PM, Blogger Mad Zionist said...

I'm certain this was just internet blather. Nobody premptively fires employees because of a tax plan that won't go into effect for at least another 6 months.

However, the presise that he WILL have to fire people and raise prices after the proposed tax increases go into effect are very real.

 
At 3:09 PM, Blogger Gert said...

Emm:

"I'm sure it is illegal to fire people for their political beliefs."

Is it? I'd have thought so too but...

MZ:

"I'm certain this was just internet blather."

Maybe so. The fact that people send such emails around and others then reprint them on their blogs is telling though...

 

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